You know kids, back in the day we didn’t have a new Internet meme every other hour.
No Hipster Ariel, Pick Up Panda or Emo Dad. Keanu Reeves was far from sad — he chose between the red pill and the blue pill, ecstatic with the sudden understanding, "I know Kung Fu."
Our nation sacrificed landline telephone connections several times a day just to hear "You’ve got mail." It took a week and a half to load a Web page filled with hamsters revolving to RogerMiller's "Whistle Stop" played at an accelerated speed. And we were damn glad to get it!
Then Y2K happened. When the grid failed to crash as the Wise Ones foretold, we thrilled to a brave new world in which a line of broken English from a long-forgotten 16-bit video game called "Zero Wing" became a rallying cry for the way we live now.
One decade ago, "someone set up us the bomb." Ladies and gentleman, "All Your Base Are Belong to Us" is 10.
In other news, you're totally old.
Thanks Urlesque!!! You kids are aces.
More stories about the annoying way we live now:
- Geek fight club old news, still stupid
- Justin Beiber fans go on Wikipedia rampage
- Batman's switch can be yours, Batcave not included
Helen A.S. Popkin isn't so much a nerd as she is a nerd-fetishist. But you're welcome to join her where she's a total poseur on Facebook and/or Twitter.
